Watchdog - The Bridge of Death

If you would make the Enchilada Game, you must prove you have the brains. First answer these questions three, ere the other side you see.

(Up steps Coach Piccione) I'm not afraid, Watchdog. What are the questions?
Watchdog: What is your team's name?
Coach Piccione: Dunder Mifflin.
Watchdog: What is your quest?
Coach Piccione: To seek the Enchilada.
Watchdog: What is the matter with Chris Johnson?
Coach Piccione: What? I don't know that!
(Coach Piccione goes flying into the abyss, done in by CJ2K, who had 19 or more in three of his last 4 coming into the game, but managed 6 or less for the sixth time this season)

(Up steps Coach Marcin) I'm not afraid, Watchdog. What are the questions?
Watchdog: What is your team's name?
Coach Marcin: The Enchilada and Toilet Bowl Champion Red Bandits!
Watchdog: What is your quest?
Coach Marcin: To seek the Enchilada.
Watchdog: What are your favorite colors?
Coach Marcin: Cowboys colors! Tony Romo rules!!!
Watchdog: You may pass onto the semi-finals. But beware of injuries to your best receivers (Greg Jennings) and the inconsistencies of anyone named "Beanie" (4 points or less for the 5th time this year).

(Up steps Coach Yeager) That was easy! I'm not afraid Watchdog! Do your worst! What are the questions?
Watchdog: What is your team's name?
Coach Yeager: Pepperoni and Cheese. Come on, come on, we're the highest scoring team in the league this year, we're not going to be slowed down by any Bridge of Death.
Watchdog: What is your quest?
Coach Yeager: To seek the Enchilada. Come on, Watchdog.
Watchdog: What was the last time Carson Palmer was a relevant fantasy football quarterback?
Coach Yeager: Wait, I don't know that! AAAAAARRRGGHHH! (Coach Yeager goes flying into the abyss, done in by picking the 38th ranked quarterback in the NFL this season. Had Pep & Cheez not been tempted by the 31st ranked passing D of the Packers and had gone instead with unheralded, unheard of TJ Yates, they might have passed this test.)

(Up steps Coach Sharp, tentatively) I - I'm not afraid Watchdog. Wh-what are questions?
Watchdog: What is your team's name?
Coach Sharp: Wallawallawalla Wombats.
Watchdog: What is your quest?
Coach Sharp: To seek the Enchilada.
Watchdog: What is your team's best receiver?
Coach Sharp: Colston - no Burleson!
Watchdog: You may pass. Better get that right next time! (Coach Sharp, nearly doing his team in by the last second replacement of Marques Colston in the starting lineup, still needed high points for the week, a last-minute TD by Marshawn Lynch providing the winning margin.)

NONE SHALL PASS - if your problem is you cannot pass (in more ways than one), perhaps you belong in the Toilet Bowl. But first you must get by the dreaded Black Knight.

Sprockets: "The Black Knight always triumphs!" And indeed Maurice Jones-Drew set the Jaguars record for career touchdowns this week, passing Fragile Fred Taylor, who had 70 in 140 games with four TDs, giving him 73 in 90 games. And indeed Maurice "the Black Knight" Jones-Drew SHOULD always triumph, even if he gets a flesh wound.

Semi-P: "Oh Lord I thank thee for granting me victory!" GRONK!!!!!

Turd: "I've cut your arm off!" And Matty Ryan has outscored Aaron Rodgers 2 of the last 3 weeks!

Brokerage: "It's just a flesh wound. I've had worse." Damn that Vick! Joe Flacco would have been better!

Fatties: "Have at thee!" Who said Brady was done? Averaging 26.6 points per game since the Pats' bye week, he is indeed looking invincible.

Dale's Doormats: "You're a loony" if you can figure out when to play the Sanchize. Simple - every even numbered week since the Jets' bye he's had at least 25 fantasy points!


I in I/R: "What are you going to do, bleed on me?" Their back-ups put up 108, even with Andre Johnson heading back to the bench. Will they start the right guys this week?

Tim & Kumar: "We'll call it a draw then?"

And the aptly-named "Sir Not-Appearing-In-This-Film" (a.k.a. Team Gump and Natural Disaster) - interestingly, the Gumpsters and Disaster took opposite routes with their bye week. Gump rested their starters, putting up a 13th best 68 points this week while Disaster's bench led the league in scoring with 111, topping even the 104 from their starters. Which team will be ready for the semi-finals? Who will be ready for the French Taunters?